Teen Lifeline
November Teen Q&A
FINAL – October 10, 2024
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Byline: Michelle Moorhead, Teen Lifeline Executive Director
Generation Now: Teens Explain What It’s Like Growing Up in 2024
You were a teenager once, so you know what it’s like to be growing up today. Right?
Guess again.
Many parents of today’s teens are unaware of a whole array of unique challenges and situations that most of us could never have imagined when we were in high school.
The fast-paced, always-connected world we live in can feel overwhelming for anyone –especially adolescents. Yet beyond the constant stream of notifications, pressures and expectations, high schoolers can be hopeful, resilient and dedicated to making a difference.
At Teen Lifeline, we recently asked several local high school seniors to share what they believe parents should know about being a teen in 2024. Recognized by their peers as leaders on their school campuses, each student gave us candid answers.
Here’s what it’s like for teenagers today, according to Yassie Sezen, a cheerleader at Notre Dame Preparatory High School in Scottsdale; Hayden Fletcher, a quarterback at Liberty High School in north Peoria; and Abbey Harris, the drum major at Centennial High School in Peoria.
We hope you find some helpful insights from what these kids have to say.
How do you feel about the world today?
Sezen: I feel like there’s so much fighting over small things and drama, but I have hope for the future.
Fletcher: I feel like our generation is very media-based and people really care a lot about their appearance. A lot of people deal with depression and anxiety because they feel like they don’t fit in or belong. One of the biggest problems is putting your appearance aside and just caring about what matters most.
Harris: I’m concerned sometimes about global issues and conflicts. It can be saddening. But in general, I’m hopeful we’ll move past it, in the sense that I think we are trying to make changes as a generation moving forward.
If you could change anything about being a teenager, what would it be?
Sezen: I wish we didn’t grow up with technology, because I feel like it kind of ruins childhood. Technology makes us grow up a lot faster and it isolates us. It’s different than how adults interacted when they were younger. It’s easier to be alone today.
Fletcher: If I could change anything it would be to end the hatred on social media. Because everything on social media gets around, everyone sees it and it spreads easily.
Harris: One thing I’ve always found frustrating about being a teenager is the fact that we’re often expected to act like adults, but we’re treated like children.
Is there anything you would change about people’s perceptions of teenagers in today’s world?
Sezen: I wish they could give us more credit. In general, adults think we don’t really know what we’re talking about. But we have valid opinions. We’re not kids anymore.
Fletcher: I feel like a lot of adults think our generation is not handling things very well. But they didn’t struggle with the same things we do today.
Harris: One perception about teenagers is that we’re quite ignorant of the world around us. But we’re quite perceptive of things in general, and I think a lot of us know more than adults give us credit for.
What is one thing you wish parents knew about being a teenager in 2024?
Sezen: That it is completely different than how they grew up.
Fletcher: The stuff that we’re going through is way different than what they went through, because of phones and social media. If you mess up once or have your own personal statement or view, people are going to find a way to judge you.
Harris: How challenging it can be to deal with social media, and the fact that anyone can contact you from anywhere at any time. It can be hard to stay on track and not get distracted, when it’s that quick for someone to contact you.
Do you wish parents were more (or less) involved?
Sezen: Less involved. Sometimes when a parent puts too much pressure on a kid it makes them want to share less, and you just have to let your kid come to you.
Fletcher: Parents don’t need to helicopter their teen. But, do check in with them every day. If a parent learns how to talk to their kid and understands what they’re going through, then they can be a comfort place for their kid to open up and be honest about things.
Harris: I actually quite like how my parents are involved in my life. They come to a lot of my events and are supportive of me. They are good about not being too far in my business. I get stuff done and they check in, but it’s not over the top.
From your perspective, what is one thing parents could do to improve their relationship with their child?
Sezen: When you make a rule, set it from an early age and stick to it. Making new rules or taking rules away can be very confusing for a child.
Fletcher: Spend more individual time with your child, even just going out to eat or to see a movie. Being in school and sports, it’s hard to find time to sit down and do that. But there’s time on the weekends to get something to eat or talk and be open like that.
Harris: Communication is a big thing. Sometimes I understand there’s something I need to do, but I’m also overwhelmed. When a parent yells at you for not getting something done, you have to explain that you were overwhelmed – and then you usually find out your parent was overwhelmed with something else, too. Just communicating makes it a lot easier to understand where each other was coming from.
How does social media affect teens’ lives?
Sezen: It’s very consuming. Social media can make you go down a deep rabbit hole and take away from your actual life.
Fletcher: As a teenager, you see some things that are hard to forget. If you see one bad thing about someone you know, or about you, that sticks with you for a while. It can alter your mindset of how you think about other people and how you think about yourself.
Harris: The pressure of having social media, communicating with each other, the need to post, or fear of missing out can be a factor that adds to the general stress of being a teenager. I don’t think being a teenager has ever been easy, but I think maybe it’s a little harder with the added stress of social media.
Do you know kids at school, or do you have friends who have considered self-harm or suicide?
Sezen: Yes. It was confusing, because I didn’t want the person to be mad at me, and I didn’t want them to think I was turning on them. But I didn’t know what to do and I wanted them to be safe, so I went to an adult.
Fletcher: Personally, I don’t know anyone. But obviously, I hear things or see things online, and I know that there are kids dying by suicide.
Harris: Yes. For some of my friends, I was able to see they were struggling, and they did confide in me. But more times than not, I didn’t find out until after the fact and it’s really saddening. They’re my friends. I have a lot of love for them. I always reassure them that they can always talk to me – and if they’re ever feeling alone, they can always reach out to me.
What is the biggest mental health issue you see at school?
Sezen: Depression – because it can manifest in many different forms. Depression can mean teens isolate themselves or overdo other things. Some people can have unhappiness that can stem from social media – they might think they’re uncool or that they’re missing out because other people look like they have a great life, but those people don’t post the bad sides, too.
Fletcher: It’s mainly loneliness. Kids eating by themselves, walking around by themselves with their heads down. I don’t know what they’re going through, but you can tell there are not a lot of people who are friends with them.
Harris: I honestly find a lot of us struggle with anxiety, depression, loneliness – or a combination of the three. I’m a very involved student so I know a lot of other very involved students, and I know that school tends to stress a lot of people out.
What else should parents know?
Sezen: I know parents want the best for their children. Children know that deep down, too. But sometimes with criticism, you can forget that. Remind your kids that you love them and that you’re trying and doing your best.
Fletcher: Do your best to look into your kids’ eyes and see them. You’re going to know your kids, and you should be able to tell when they’re going through something. A lot of parents just blow it off and assume their kid is alright. Just check in on your kids more often than you do already because you never know what your kid is going through. Just because they act okay at school or at home doesn’t mean that everything is alright.
Harris: Everyone struggles sometimes, and if one of your kids is struggling, it’s normal. Try to help them. No one wants to be alone in that kind of fight. Try to be understanding and help them get out of that slump. I think everyone has their lows and sometimes you just need someone to help pull you out of it.
Michelle Moorhead is the executive director of Teen Lifeline, a Phoenix-based, nonprofit dedicated to preventing teen suicide in Arizona.
Talking About Your Problems. Teens need practice verbalizing their feelings.
And when they do tell you about what’s going on in their life, they need to feel
validated.
But every teen doesn’t feel comfortable talking with their parents. If that’s the
case, help your teen identify other adults they would feel comfortable talking to,
like a relative, a teacher, a coach or a member of the clergy.
If your child is unwilling to talk about their problems out loud, journaling can also
provide a positive outlet for processing difficult feelings
Talking About Your Problems. Teens need practice verbalizing their feelings.
And when they do tell you about what’s going on in their life, they need to feel
validated.
But every teen doesn’t feel comfortable talking with their parents. If that’s the
case, help your teen identify other adults they would feel comfortable talking to,
like a relative, a teacher, a coach or a member of the clergy.
If your child is unwilling to talk about their problems out loud, journaling can also
provide a positive outlet for processing difficult feelings
Talking About Your Problems. Teens need practice verbalizing their feelings.
And when they do tell you about what’s going on in their life, they need to feel
validated.
But every teen doesn’t feel comfortable talking with their parents. If that’s the
case, help your teen identify other adults they would feel comfortable talking to,
like a relative, a teacher, a coach or a member of the clergy.
If your child is unwilling to talk about their problems out loud, journaling can also
provide a positive outlet for processing difficult feelings
Talking About Your Problems. Teens need practice verbalizing their feelings.
And when they do tell you about what’s going on in their life, they need to feel
validated.
But every teen doesn’t feel comfortable talking with their parents. If that’s the
case, help your teen identify other adults they would feel comfortable talking to,
like a relative, a teacher, a coach or a member of the clergy.
If your child is unwilling to talk about their problems out loud, journaling can also
provide a positive outlet for processing difficult feeling
Another article by Michelle Moorhead: